Artist Residency in Portugal.

Roundabout.LX

17th July - 30th August.

My Residency in Portugal, Lisbon started with me trying to find my feet.

 

Eventually the work with the dough progressed into a live performance with a dialogue as follows:

 

 

Making dough why didn’t my mum send me to art therapy? I think to myself as I reflect on the chaos of my life and notice the total calm I feel now as I need away.

I feel calm watching the transformation of salt water and oil and flour turn to this soft structure integration

The softness

Its smooth and soft

Breathing in needing out

Breathing in my need to need

Breathing out my need to need

 

The table that I needed on earlier today squeaked like lovers in bed

In and out up and down

Losing my fingers finding them again wrapping around it moving into it pulling, pushing away just to dive in again

Pushing pushing

 

The intimacy of me losing myself in it

Spreading it out

I need it

 

Why do I sometimes hold on for ages when I clearly need to go to the toilet?

 

I position it

I position the dough in front of my vagina

And slap it and hold it

I am happy with this place

I let it go

 

The other day I ate 7 chocolate biscuits a croissant a packet of Doritos a kit kat a chicken salad and a coke and a coffee

I think I was pre menstrual that day

This dough reminds me of skin

Like my stomach 

 Protects me it holds my insides in

 

The other day I walked into the chemist and because I needed some Vaseline I was making a cast of my arm so I asked the pharmacist for vasoline I made a gesture like this

He didn’t speak English so I thought the gesture might help

Here I will show you

 Telling this guy I needed to make a cast of my arm

He had no idea what I was saying

He just looked at me I just looked back

It wasn’t until I left that I thought ,that might of looked totally odd to him

I need

Breathing in the need to need breathing it out

My farther liked Elvis

Love me tender love me sweet never let me go

You have made my life complete

And I love you so

Love me tender love me true

All my dreams fulfill

 

I place it again in front of my vagina and I pat it and slap it

I slap it again

This time im really going to let go and see what happens ……….

 

Nothing